WINCE

I gained three pounds this week.  Three.

And I don't even have a good excuse. I know exactly what went wrong.

The CSA brought us a big handful of tomatillas, two weeks ago. Now, I like Mexican food, but a little tomatilla goes a long way, and I didn't really want to be eating Mexican every night. So last weekend, I made a huge batch of guacamole. Six avocados' worth.

I had a plan, to keep myself from eating all that guacamole. Half of it, I sent with my husband to his monthly D&D game. The guys devoured it more or less instantly, and were, by all reports, most grateful.

Now, while he was at his game, I'd intended to meet up with some friends and their kids for dinner. I figured that would give my kids something to do to keep them occupied, and I could take along the rest of the guacamole and some chips, and sure I'd eat some, but so would my friends (and maybe even the kids). It was a plan!

Alas, the friends had to reschedule, and I found myself sitting at home, with the kids in bed and the husband still out... And the guac and chips were just sitting there. Begging to be eaten. I didn't eat all of it, but I probably ate more than I would've if I'd shared it.

And then I had some more the next day. And later that night, for a snack. And then the day after that, I was home alone, waiting on the A/C repair crew, and there was really only a little bit left...

It's not even the guacamole that killed me, though the gods know it's full of fat. But avocado oil is one of the healthy ones, and overindulging on avocado doesn't pack on three pounds in a week. Nope. That was the chips. It's the fried starches and the salt. Not only are they fattening, not only do they make me retain water for days afterward, but I can't stop. If there is an open bag of chips in the house, I will eat some. And then I will eat some more. And then I will lick my fingers and pry the crumbs out of the corners of the bag.

This is why I should not allow chips into my house. Three. Frikkin. Pounds. Ouch.

(But it was amazing guacamole.)

Little Off The Top

I lost 0.6 this week, which nudges me just past where I was before I went on vacation, to 158.2. If that .2 had fallen off, I could officially say that I've lost a total of 115 pounds, but oh well. I'm actually surprised that I lost at all, because I wound up eating out quite a lot last week, and did not meet any of my exercise goals.

I'm trying to be good this week so I can indulge this weekend. It's my daughter's birthday tomorrow, and the party is Saturday, plus a book I wrote is being released, so I've got a lot of fun stuff planned for this weekend, and a fair amount of it involves wonderful, delicious, really quite bad for me food.

But! But! But! I was in dire need of a t-back bra to wear with a dress, and I just happened to be passing by a Victoria's Secret, so I thought -- why not? I went in, and not only did they have exactly the bra I needed, in my size, and in the color I needed -- but it was incredibly comfortable. I mean, weirdly comfortable. Bras are not, in my experience (many years of it, because I was a C cup by the 7th grade), ever actually comfortable. I was insanely excited about that bra for days after I bought it. I haven't been able to shop at Victoria's Secret since early college -- and now I can't wait to go back, slightly expensive or not!

Normal

I'm up 1.8 pounds over the last two weeks, back over the 160 mark to 160.2. (It was even higher than that, Monday, but that's not official.)

No stress. No regrets, either. I mostly tried to eat sensibly, but there was a fair amount of fattening food, and there was some stress-eating, and then there was a Garrett kiosk at the airport as I was leaving, and then I met up with a friend for fancy French food, and there was the Mike's Hard Lemonade that (once I thought to look it up) had about 50% more calories than I'd estimated (and alcohol makes me retain water for a day or so, anyway).

We did a bit of walking around, but not as much as I'd expected, and what with one thing and another, I only got to the gym once in the last two weeks. (When I went back on Monday, it kicked my ass, but it felt really good.)

So... Yeah. I splurged a bit, and I bloody well enjoyed it, and now I'm back on the wagon, and the weight is coming back off.

This is what normal people do, right? They go on vacation and splurge and gain a little, and then they buckle down to get it back under control before it can get out of hand.

Yeah. I can do that. I can do this.

And Up Again

That pound I lost last week? It came back. No question as to why, either: grilled fajitas with friends on Saturday, followed by Father's Day ice cream and BLTs, corn on the cob, watermelon, and more ice cream on Sunday. And then Rock Band Night Monday.

I don't think any one of them would have hurt me too bad, but put all together... yeah, I'm back up a bit.

And you know what? It was totally worth it. Summer is the best time for good food. Grilled chicken and peppers and onions, farmer's market tomatoes and corn and watermelon... You damn well better believe I went back for seconds!

So I'm back up over 160, a bit, but I'm not sweating it. I didn't gain it by slipping back into old bad habits, covertly snarfing doughnuts and candy bars in the office kitchen. I gained it eating good food with good friends and having a good time, and I'm confident I'll lose it again. No regrets.

(Is this how normal people feel about food? I could get used to it.)

ACK

I'm up three pounds this week. That puts me at 172.8, which is perilously close to making me lose my 100-pounds-lost cred.

It's Karen's fault. She lost like six pounds this week, so she must have greebled my loss.

I'm sure it has nothing to do with the fact that I ate like a quarter of a king cake all by myself, and had cupcakes and chocolate cookies and triscuits for Valentine's Day and went out to eat and had mashed potatoes instead of broccoli and went to Rock Band and ate more cupcakes and chips and was generally and in all other ways and complete pig all week. Nope, not at all the problem.

So it's back in the saddle and strict logging and actually measuring portions instead of eyeballing them. And just to be sure, until I've lost those three pounds, plus one more for good measure, I'm cutting out any and all food after 7pm. Doesn't matter if I have points left. Doesn't matter how hungry I am. Doesn't matter where I am or what I'm doing or who I'm with. No. Food. After. 7. Until I have an official weigh-in that's below (not at) 169.

I've come too far to let laziness and gluttony triumph over me now.

WTH

The Wii Fit tells me that I've gained three pounds in the last four days, undoing two or three weeks' worth of progress.

But I bought some jeans a couple of weeks ago that I could zip up but not sit down in, and as of this morning, I can, in fact, both zip them up and sit down. They're not the comfiest pair of pants I own, but I'm wearing them and expect to make it through the day just fine.

What. The. Hell.

(Oh yeah, and this weekend? Valentine's party. For which I've already made cupcakes. I don't expect next week's weigh-in to be anything like happy.)

Ha!

Well, the Wii Fit, as usual, says I gained a pound and a half between Monday and today, but the bathroom scale failed to get the memo, so I'm down 1.4 pounds this week, to 169.8. Whether my weird little down-up pattern will be back on track next week and pop me back up into the 170s, I don't know.

Everything is moving so slowly these days, I've caught myself wondering if I would be content to call it done sooner than I'd originally thought, maybe somewhere in the 160s. It's tempting. I made the really big goals -- the 100 pounds lost, the dip out of the "obese" category. Goals forward from here all seem sort of... lackluster. And I think I look pretty good, actually. I'm in Mediums and Larges, so I can shop pretty much wherever I want. I wouldn't mind a little less loose skin around my arms and legs, and a little less muffin peeking over my tighter pants, but I expect I'm stuck with the granny arms and thighs -- at my age, the skin isn't as elastic as it once was -- and what of it can be fixed is going to be the result of patience and targeted muscle building, not mere loss. Or, possibly, surgery (yes, I've seriously given consideration to surgery to fix the granny arms, but I don't think I can afford it).

On the other hand, I'm still firmly in the "overweight" category, and while I have a lot of issues with the BMI categories, I expect the 160s are still much heavier than optimal for someone my height. I certainly don't expect to get back to my high school/early college weight -- if nothing else, I've had two babies since then, and the change to my boobs is probably worth a solid 5 pounds all by itself. But it might be nice to get within 10-15 pounds of that weight.

So I'm trying to fight that temptation -- once I got back on plan after the holidays, I did start losing again. And it's not like I get to relax all that much once I graduate to maintenance. Not if I want to avoid backsliding and regaining a lot of weight. And honestly, maintenance is even harder than losing, because there isn't that sense of change to keep you motivated.

So for now, I'll keep plugging away at it.

...And Up

Today's weigh-in: 175.8, which is up 1.8 pounds from last week. Can't say I'm terribly surprised, what with the party, and the other party, and the third party, and the stress-eating, and then the friend over for dinner and margaritas last night.

Looking at my chart, though, it looks like I've been more or less maintaining since Thanksgiving (down and then up and down and then up and down and then...) which is not horribly unreasonable, what with all the birthdays and holidays and such. So my son's birthday is today, and we're having my parents over tomorrow for Christmas Eve dinner, and then Friday is Christmas.

And then it'll be time to throw out or give away any leftover candy and cookies and other goodies, and get my behind back into the gym, and get back on the diet wagon and start making some serious progress.

Bracing

Well, I weighed in at 174 this morning, which is down 1.2 from last week's "real" weight, so good job, me! (Also, it's a grand total of 99 pounds lost, which doesn't even seem real.)

Of course, I suspect I'm about to fall right the heck back off the wagon, here. Friday is my office's holiday party -- and since I was the coordinator, I already know exactly what awesome food is going to be there. And Saturday is our Christmas party at home (again with the tasty treats). And Sunday is the family party to celebrate my son's birthday.

No matter how restrained I am, getting on the scale Monday morning is going to be painful, I expect.

Oh, well. Let's talk about realistic expectations: I told myself that I'd be satisfied with maintaining through the holidays, which means that my weigh-in on January 6th (the first weigh-in that's completely out of the holiday block) should be no more than 175.6, which is where I was at the beginning of December. And the last time I addressed my goals, back in October, I talked about wanting to hit my 100 total pounds lost mark by the end of January. Which, I think, is still eminently reasonable and perfectly doable, despite the temptations of the next few days.

Which is not so much giving myself permission to misbehave as it is acknowledging reality, taking responsibility for correcting any slip-ups, and promising to move forward without too many glances backward.

Dodge!

This morning's weigh-in was 181.4, which is .6 lost this week, 91.6 total.  Not an outstanding loss, but given the lack of control I was having with the Hallowe'en candy, I'm happy to have lost at all.

This week's challenge:  my birthday.  We're having dinner with my family on Sunday, and my actual birthday is Monday.  I executed some preemptive damage-reduction and told my mom and husband that I'd make my own cake, and then I spent a day or so trolling the Weight Watchers recipe database for lower-point desserts.  (I finally decided to make two of them:  a two-layer meringue/mousse, and gingerbread cupcakes.  I'm doing the cupcakes for the family party because my sister-in-law is allergic to both strawberries and chocolate, and also because I can slather the cupcakes with cream cheese frosting and no one will need to know that they're diet friendly.)  Still, the possibility for excessive dessert consumption lingers, so that's what I'll need to try to avoid.

I'm also looking ahead to the challenge that is Thanksgiving.  I've volunteered to bring pumpkin soup; I may also offer to bring lightened dressing and sweet potato dishes.  And possibly dessert.  (Honestly, I was going to volunteer to have Thanksgiving dinner at our house this year, but my mom is insisting.  I don't think she'll object, however, if I take some of the cooking off her hands.)

I also dusted off the Wii Fit this morning (pretty much literally -- I haven't so much as looked at it for three months or more) and did a little yoga.  That's got less to do with weight loss (yoga isn't exactly a calorie-burner) and more to do with my noticing twinges in my feet again lately, and yoga did more to help that than anything else, ever.  So I want to try to do a little Wii Fit yoga in the mornings.  The goal right now is to do about 15 minutes of yoga, at least 3 times a week.  Ideally, I'd like to make it part of my weekday routine, but I don't want to get too ambitious too fast -- and I need to see how it fits into the morning schedule, anyway.  If it works out well (and I can adjust to not hitting the snooze on my alarm three or four times in a row) I might start to tack on some of the strength training exercises, as well.  But for now, just the yoga, just 15 minutes, to get my feet back in line.

Chugging Along

Didn't post yesterday because I didn't have my little chart with me. But here it is: I'm down to 183.2 pounds, which is just 0.2 away from reaching the "90 pounds lost" milestone. That's 2.2 for the week -- unless you take into account the inexplicable, 1-day-only uptick I had last week on Wednesday. If you assume I was actually at 185 last week, then this was a 1.8 loss. Either way, pretty darned good, for lately.

I'm trying to remember to eat my activity points, either the day I earn them or the day after. I didn't quite manage it last week, mostly because work was doing this crazy thing where I was working absurd hours (no, really -- I went into the office at 10AM Sunday and didn't leave until 3:30 Monday morning) and it completely threw my eating out of joint. I'm actually really proud of myself for sticking to the diet through all that and not diving headfirst into the pizza and Chinese food that was being offered around.

So I really don't know whether it was the stress or the eating of APs or the screwed up sleep or what that helped me along. We'll see what happens, I suppose.

Did I mention that my brand new size 40-D bras are all on their tightest hooks, already? It's snug, but it's there. Which means it's about time for me to order some 38s. The "D" portion is still a bit in question -- I have to moosh things around to get everything to fit in the cups right, so I'm about half-pondering ordering 38-DDs instead of 38Ds. But I'm excited that I can see the end of the 40s.

It's worth noting that I was a 36C in high school, and a 38C in college -- and given the way boobs change for pregnancy and then don't change back, 38D may be the smallest chest size I can hope for. It's also worth noting that it's exclusively my chest that's keeping me from moving solidly into size Medium clothes -- when Ms don't fit, it's because they pull awkwardly across my boobs. Another couple of inches will probably get me into Ms for good, but if I'm giving up hope of a C cup, I might also have to give up hope of ever getting into a Small.

(Given that I started out at a 3X, though... I can live with M. Y'know?)

Danger Zone approaching. Hallowe'en looms! But aside from the caramel candy corn (which I'd happily eat by the pound), I'm not too terribly tempted, this year. If candy gets put in front of me, I'd certainly eat it (let's be honest) but I'm not eying the fun-sized chocolates and nerds and laffy taffy up on top of our fridge with unbridled longing, like I was last year. I think I'll be okay with 2-3 pieces on Hallowe'en night, and then making sure the rest all gets passed out to the neighborhood kids.

Matt and I talked about my birthday, and I suggested that I make my own cake/cupcakes/whatever -- that way I can both pick a lower-point option and have more confidence in my serving sizes. Of course, that means I need to start researching my options.

The weekend after my birthday, I'm taking a trip to Atlanta, so that will probably interfere with my diet a bit, but the family I'm staying with is extremely health-conscious, so it should only be a real problem on the travel days (airport food, whee) and if we're eating at the zoo or aquarium or other tourist-y places with standard junk food fare.

Oops.

Gained 0.8 this week - 194.2.

I'm a bit disappointed, but not horribly stressed over it, since there's not much question of why it happened.

Guess my metabolism is crap enough that I'm just not able to dip significantly into my weekly or activity points. I earned 9 APs this week, and used a total of maybe 10 points above my daily minimum. Oh, well. Back to the drawing board.

I also should probably take a tighter grip on the evening snacks. I've been slipping, there, all week. The points are logged -- and sometimes I'm having them specifically to get up to my daily minimum -- but late-night calories just don't burn as efficiently. I'm tempted, in fact, to lay at least 3/4 of this gain on Monday night, when for whatever reason, I just could not stop eating. Need to make up my plan early in the day, stick to it as closely as possible, and come up with things to do in the evenings that make it hard for me to snack.

On the other hand, it's my first actual gain since I started the diet. (Not counting the one that happened the week after I had the stomach flu, which was arguably nothing more than rehydration; or the probable small gain I had the week of Christmas when I wasn't here to weigh in, but which was already gone by the next week.) So that's not bad, for ten months worth of dieting.

Wait, What?

Apparently, chocolate-peanut butter confections are on the list of things I can't have in the house because I will not eat Just One. And also, possibly, malted candy (Whoppers and its kin). Leftover Easter candy in the house was pretty dangerous, and though I mostly held off during the day, there were a lot of evenings this week when I'd go into the kitchen to feed the cat before I went to bed and that bag of junk food would call to me, and I'd stand at the counter (because, apparently, if no one sees me eating candy, it doesn't count?) and eat two or three pieces of candy. (Just one mini cadbury egg -- they're only one point each. Oh, well, okay, and a Reese egg. Oooh, and there's a packet of Robin Eggs left! Like that.)

Admittedly, this is still an improvement in habit over previous years, where I wouldn't have managed to restrain myself until bedtime, and I most certainly wouldn't have stopped at only two or three pieces. But still, not that good.

On top of that, my husband and I celebrated our anniversary by going out to eat for lunch Monday, and I very carefully and deliberately chose to go off-diet. I did not want to fret over how many points I had. I had a buttered roll and french onion soup (with cheese and croutons, thank you) and filet mignon (which is actually pretty low in points, for beef, but that's not why I chose it) with garlic mashed potatoes and buttered vegetables. And I had coconut cake and caramel ice cream for dessert. It was lovely and decadent and strictly out of curiosity, I came home and put it in the tracker (though I was totally guessing at the points on the cake and the amount of butter) and it turned out that the meal exceeded my daily points allowance. By a significant amount.

But damn, it was worth it, and I approached the scale this morning having already accepted that I had probably gained. I hoped it wasn't more than a pound. I was secretly hoping for a "maintain."

The scale said 218.4. Well, that's not so bad, I thought. I didn't go back up over 220, at least-- Wait, what? Wasn't I at 219.something last week?

Obviously, Penny had jumped on it and upset the alignment. I re-zeroed it and stepped on again. 218.4. That's a 1.4 pound loss. 54.6 pounds total.

Well, then. We'll see. As a friend pointed out, sometimes the weight gain holds off somehow until the next weigh-in, so I don't expect I can completely relax.

But at least the Easter candy is all gone.

Confessions

I burned through some extra points this weekend.

I stayed inside my weekly points, but I exceeded my daily points for three straight days, which I don't usually do. So on Wednesday morning, I'm either going to lose some weight and find out that no really, I can use some of my activity or weekly points without completely falling apart, or I'm going to maintain/gain and learn that no, really, I need to keep my intake to somewhere just below my daily allowance.

I honestly have no idea which it's going to be.

On Friday, I'd planned a spectacularly low-point dinner. I worked everything out and discovered that I had ample space in my dietary budget for a candy bar in the afternoon. About ten seconds after I licked the last delicious chocolate off my fingers, my husband called to tell me that some friends had called and wanted to take us out for Mexican. Well... heck.

To cut down on the damage, I forbade myself even a single chip, and I had vegetarian fajitas. I didn't eat the tortillas, but then I never do -- I dump the lettuce and sour cream and guacamole onto the fajita plate and add about half of my refried beans and mix it all up into a fajita salad. (Yes, the restaurant offers a fajita salad already made, but it doesn't taste the same, and it's only about half as much food once you ignore the fried tortilla bowl thingy.)

So I think, all in all, I didn't do too badly, there. It was certainly more points than I'd planned on having that day, but I don't think I exceeded the boundaries of reasonableness too much.

Saturday was a birthday party, and I went fully intending to fix myself a single plate of food, with a pre-figured amount of specific foods on it, and to skip the cake.

But there were no plates (and I was apparently too dumb to just ask for one) so I found myself wandering back to the food table and grazing and I ate crackers and paté that I hadn't banked on, and more mini-muffins than I'd planned, and only a fraction of the veggies, and then I had chili and... well, heck, might as well have just a small piece of cake, right?

Sigh. Next time, I will remember to ask for a plate, and then I will get my planned amount of food and go plant my butt on the couch and not keep walking back over to the food table. And then, if I give in and have cake anyway, at least it will not be on top of extra muffins and paté and chili that I hadn't planned on.

Sunday was an early Easter dinner with my family. I brought low-cal biscuits, only took one, filled my plate once and did not have any seconds. I also brought my own dessert and managed to avoid the temptation of cookies. So the only real problem for the day was that 1) I have no idea whether my guesstimates of how much ham and potato salad I ate were correct, and 2) I have no idea how many points my mom's potato salad is. (It ranges from 3 to 8 points per half cup, in the WW database. I'm quite sure I ate more than half a cup of the stuff.)

As an aside, have you ever noticed that for certain foods -- potato salad, or mac-and-cheese, or other really common dishes where every family has its own variant -- the one you grew up with is always the Right One? And everyone else's variant is always just a bit... off? Could be really good, but it's not THE food? Which is sad, because I have no idea what my mom's recipe is for potato salad. (At least I have her mac-and-cheese recipe.)

So anyway, there's my confession. We'll find out Wednesday if my damage control efforts did any good, or if I completely blew it.

Tick.

Weigh-in time! This morning, I stepped on the scale and it said 225.0.

Uh... What? I stepped off, and it said, "ERR 0". Ah, that makes more sense -- the kids had probably been playing on it and gotten it un-zeroed. I re-zeroed the scale and stepped on again. 230.4. Much more likely.

That's a 1.2 pound drop -- not as much as I was hoping for, but more than I was expecting, to be honest. The baby was sick last week, so I spent most of it working half-days and spending the other half of the day at home, and then Monday was a snow day, so I spent that whole day at home, and... home just isn't a very good place for me to be on a diet.

At work, I can steel myself to some level of discipline. I eat breakfast, I eat lunch, I eat my afternoon snack. If I'm hungry before lunch or before my usual snacktime, I have a few cans of low-point soup stashed in the cabinet, and some pickled beets (don't judge me) in the fridge. I go through at least 36 ounces of liquid while I'm sitting at my desk (in some combination of coffee, tea, and diet soda).

But at home... If the baby doesn't eat all of his handful of mini nilla wafers or slices of banana, I might as well pop one or two in my mouth rather than throw them out and let them go to waste. There's that tub of cool whip in the fridge every time I open it, and one fingerful isn't going to cost me that much, right? And hey, there's that Valentine candy that I got on sale that's only 1 point a bag; what's one point between friends? I don't have a drink ready at hand all the time (it's easier not to have one nearby when the kids are romping on me) so I tend to get hungry faster and snack more -- and even the healthy snacks add up. An average 8oz apple or pear is 2 points. All things that, individually, wouldn't make a difference, but if you add them up over a whole week's worth of snitching and cheating... do.

And I didn't make it to the gym even once in the last week. I was doing workouts on the Wii Fit (wiirkouts, I dubbed them) so I wasn't being a complete slug, but the Wii Fit does not get my heart rate up to 120 and hold it there for thirty or forty minutes solid. (I was hoping I'd get to the gym today, but my car is in the shop. BAH. Maybe I'll make it tonight.)

So, all that taken together, I'm not too displeased with this past week's weigh-in. But here's hoping I'm back on the speed train this coming week.

Fail

I succumbed.

Someone left half a bag of freaking candy corn in the kitchen, and I fell prey to its siren song.

I was poised to deal with doughnuts, with candy canes, with sugar cookies, even with those peanut butter cookies topped with a Hershey's kiss.

But how was I supposed to resist candy corn? That's Hallowe'en candy! I'd dropped those defenses for the year! And not just a handful, either. I snarfed so many of those little puppies that I actually feel faintly nauseous, now.

I'd track the points and chalk it up to a learning experience, except that I have no way to know how many servings I ate. Three? Four?

And tomorrow we're having our belated family Christmas dinner, and we're having both pecan pie and coconut custard pie for dessert. Coconut custard!

I'm doomed.

*deep breath*

One failure -- or two, or three, or even a dozen -- does not mean the diet is doomed. Deprivation is not the answer, and neither is defeatism. I had some of my best weight loss ever in weeks where I was indulging a little almost every day. This is not the end of the world, right?

Right. It probably isn't even as bad as the pizza and carrot cake and ice cream that I had at Gran'ma's house last week. I just can't let it become a pattern. I'll eat a healthy breakfast and lunch tomorrow before the dinner, and only the one piece of pie (not one of each!) and then on Friday I'll get my ass back on that wagon. I'll find healthier outlets for whatever stress is driving me to eat past the point of nausea. I'll go to the gym and work it off -- the stress, and the extra calories.

I am not going to be defeated by candy. I am certainly not going to be defeated by stale candy. Right?

'Tis the Season

Last night, we exchanged gifts with our next-door neighbors, since they're leaving today for two weeks. They gave us a cute snowman decoration, and a tin of homemade cookies. (2 points each? Ish?)

There are two boxes of my favorite doughnuts in the kitchen. (6 points each) And a tin of sugar-glazed pecans. (4 points for 1/4c)

In my office is a gift ornament containing eight Ghiradelli chocolate squares. (3 points for 2 squares.) Also, six candy canes. (1 point each)

The doughnuts are the hardest to deal with, and the most dangerous -- I'm constitutionally incapable of only eating one, so I really don't dare indulge. The candy canes are the easiest -- even if I eat all six, it's not completely disastrous. (Which, perversely, makes it easier for me to eat fewer of them.)

Next week, we're going to be out of town, visiting family and (hopefully) friends. Which means I'll spend a lot of time both bored and surrounded by food. We'll eat out a lot. Various relatives will pull out all the stops and have fabulous meals. And then we'll come back and have a big Christmas dinner with my family.

The goal. If I say I'm going to keep losing through all that, then I'm just setting myself up for failure. So the goal is not to stick religiously to the plan, but to try to be a little sensible. The goal is to journal everything, even if it means having to record that I went way overboard on multiple occasions. The goal is to gain no more than 5 pounds over the next two weeks. If, on January 2, I step on the scale and it says 253, then I will have succeeded. And then I will get back on the wagon and lose those pounds before they have a chance to unpack and make friends.

Here's hoping.

Breakfast

Trying something different for breakfast. I've already switched out my coffee for hot tea, though that's a winter thing, and I'll almost certainly go back to coffee in the spring.

But now I've swapped out one of my two packets of instant grits for a little cup of Fiber One yogurt. It's a one-point reduction, and gives my system a couple of different kinds of food to process, so it seems to last a bit longer.

And since the yogurt takes up some milk/calcium slack, I replaced the half-cup of milk I was drinking with my pills and vitamins with a few swallows of Crystal Light. Which saves me another point.

It's goofy that I'm working on ways to save points right now, because I'm still ending each day with a handful of points to spare. (I'll almost be grateful when I drop to the next category down.) Still, it's good practice for the future. And certainly helpful on days like today, when I've got a pasta, butter, and dessert-laden holiday lunch looming over me.

Downs and Ups

I'm up 2.2 pounds this week, but since I was down an unnatural 6.6 last week, I'm not stressing over it -- that's still an average of 2 pounds lost each of the last two weeks, and it means I successfully navigated Thanksgiving. (I think. It's hard to tell, what with the whole "regaining fluid weight" thing after being sick.)

And now begins the hell that is the holiday season on a diet.

The regular full-sized candy canes I bought for my advent calendar at work are 1 point each. The Mint Truffle Hershey's Kisses I bought to put in the advent calendar at home are half a point each. So that's an extra 1.5 points per day for me. Not too hard to carve out of my daily allowance, really -- I could just cut back on the milk I have with dinner, or skip dessert. But that's just the beginning.

Wish me luck.

Seasonal

Doughnuts in the kitchen this morning.

At least they're Dunkin' Donuts and not Krispy Kreme, but still... temptation.

Let the Season Of Foodage begin. Can I get through the next five weeks without going back over 255? We shall see!